BY: Amber Cabral
The words ally and advocate are pretty common terms these days. As companies look back over the last year of commitments, challenging discussions and transformative change amidst what has been the double whammy of a global pandemic and a racial reckoning here in the US, many are looking for confirmation that their allyship and advocacy is making an impact. As I share in every one of my courses: allyship and advocacy are action words, not titles or labels. You have to take steps, lean in and do things that may make you nervous, or be willing to apologize when you misstep, or a great many other behaviors that bring allyship and advocacy to life.
Let’s start with simply defining allyship and advocacy and making sure we are clear on what the differences are between the two, then talk through a couple of examples.
ALLYSHIP is when someone with privilege and power seeks to learn about the experiences of a marginalized group of people, develops empathy for them and identifies ways to extend their privilege to the marginalized group. ADVOCACY is the process where someone with privilege and power is willing to take steps to protect, advocate for and dismantle systems against a marginalized group of people. Allyship is about people and their marginalized identities being included in opportunity, where advocacy is about interrupting the way systems, practices and processes impact the ways marginalized folks experience life.
An ally learns about the differences between how they experience privilege, and how that is different than someone else’s experience. They listen, learn, and share what they learn with others. Allies center the person and aim to extend some of their own privilege to someone who doesn’t have it.
Here is an example of allyship: Imagine you are the leader in the room and notice that one person, Tai (who belongs to a marginalized community) keeps getting talked over, and she doesn’t speak up. As the leader in the room, you chime in to say, “I’d like to hear what Tai has to share, “and shift the entire energy in the room. It extends the privilege you have as the leader to Tai. That’s allyship behavior.
Advocates actively protect people from harm, aim to change processes or systems that can cause folks harm, even if they do not affect them, personally. An advocate will challenge a practice that benefits them because it does not serve everyone fairly – in some cases it may even oppress some people. For example, imagine you are planning a get-together at your home and begin to make a guestlist. You want to invite a dear friend who is trans, but also know you have another good friend who has behaved in transphobic ways. An advocate will elect to not invite the transphobic person to get-togethers as a way to interrupt the transphobia doing harm to someone. Do you still love your friend who is transphobic? Sure. But an advocate will understand that continuing to include them in social settings where they can do harm is not advocating for trans identity.
Allyship and advocacy are both essential behaviors. Different situations will call for one or the other. The thing to keep top of mind when working to be an ally or an advocate or both is that each will require you to make some tough decisions and to be brave about challenging the status quo in ways you may not have considered in the past. Being different is the only way we can get to a world where we all have the opportunity to overcome oppression and experience equity. How can you start showing up as an ally and an advocate today?
Amber Cabral is the author of Allies and Advocates and a diversity and inclusion consultant to major retailers and the Fortune 500 at her company CabralCo.